This year has given some people an opportunity to think deeply about their life now and their life ahead. And for some people what emerges from this depth is a disconnect between the life they are living now and the life they want to live. This clarity is a wonderful gift but almost as soon as it is found, the barriers come marching in. In this article we’ll be exploring what is required of us to move forward towards the life we truly want.
The conditions (barriers) we put on ourselves before we allow ourselves to create are absolutely rational and real (insane) in our head.
We say to ourselves, “Before I can really become an artist, before I can create this work, this project, this business, before I can live the life I feel so deeply is inside of me, I must first”…
Have endless amounts of free time
Work on overcoming all my self doubt
Have a detailed plan laid out for exactly how and what I am going to do (and ideally have someone approve this plan for me)
Be open and detached from any plan
Have a agent/ publicist/ representation/ backing
Have permission and approval from my parents/ partner/ friends/ enemies
Be more like everyone else
Be original, unique and different
Have worked through all my fears and be fearless
Have endless amounts of cash in the bank
Stop focusing so much on the money
Be ridden of all procrastination
Have worked through all past sadness, pain and hurt so that I am not ‘damaged’
Have worked tirelessly to overturn a government that does not value art and culture
Have completely clocked out of societal matters like politics, the news etc
Truly invest meaning into my pure existence
Not take myself and everything so seriously
Be at the top off the self compassion leaderboard
Not compare myself to or compete with anyone else
Be liked and loved by everyone
Be in a serene and beautiful cabin in the woods all on my own
Know for sure that I cannot fail
Have reputable industry status
Do more courses and training to get official qualifications
Have a proper job
Own a house
Find love
Stay away from love because it will get in the way of my creating
And then…and then…
There will always be another barrier. Another thing we have to overcome, another destination we have to get to first. A requirement before permission is granted. Something between who we are now and who we want to be. The life we have and the life we want. Something between the idea and the action.
As I said, these barriers can feel very real to us. Even when we lay them out like this and see how ludicrous and often contradictory these conditions are, we still experience them as real in so many ways. There is then, a tension.
So what to do?
“We must forget the destination and return to the process. We must find ways to gently create alongside the ‘barriers’.”
Well, we must first allow a bit of breathing space for this tension to exist. Instead of ignoring it, resisting it or trying to aggressively overcome it in one fell swoop, we must forget the destination and return to the process. We must find ways to gently create alongside the ‘barriers’. Learning to say to ourselves, “I matter. This work matters. This is meaningful to me. I trust my own path. These conditions aren’t perfect but that’s okay. I can do this. This is worth it”. And from this place of compassion we take action. And then something rather magical begins to happen. The barriers start to organically thaw in this subtle yet powerful process. In the process of creating we are no longer stuck at the foot of a mountain, instead we are creating our own meandering path, a beautiful scenic route and we’ve quite forgotten about any mountain. We’re just happy to be in motion.
I don’t believe the paths ahead are blocked - we know this deep down. The paths we see are simply not for us. There is no path already made that can match the unique beat of our heart. This is what we feel.
We know we must go ahead and create our own path and this understandably scares us. Creating your own path takes courage, time and patience. Compassion is what we need in endless supply in our backpacks. Compassion is gentle yet powerful. Compassion tells us to sit down and take a rest when we are tired. Compassion restores our faith when we are questioning. Compassion helps us find our way when we are lost. Compassion is what feeds courage and courage is what keeps us going.
So, what small and gentle action can you take this week to start moving forward with your creative life, regardless of the conditions in your way? Why not commit to it by sharing it with me? I love receiving your emails. You can email me on hello@figregory.com. I look forward to hearing from you.